The Soapbox

I forgot why I bought a $79 bike at Walmart in spring 2018. Nobody knows what prompted that decision, but something in my heart just said, “Let’s give it a try.”

The Soapbox will now be a place for Berkeley residents, UC Berkeley students and Daily Cal staff, past and present, to write 600-800 word essays about experiences or encounters they’ve had in the city of Berkeley. 

I hope that they will not be coerced into STEM just because their parents feel the need to “start early.” Instead, they should be able to ignite and pursue their own curiosity, whether it’s through putting mentos in coke or trying to burn something using a flashlight. More than anything, I wish for young girls around the world to have the freedom to do what they want.

I’m tired of filling out identity charts at Women in STEM events. I no longer want to try to commodify myself into an object that companies like Amazon want. And I no longer want to see STEM as a mere stepping stone to a stable life. I want to be driven toward pursuing technology to create an impact, not amass more wealth.

After my family learned I was a lesbian, I separated myself from church because of their homophobic treatment toward me. But now that I’ve become aware of its true history and purposes in Latin America, not only do I not want to be associated with it for its homophobic rhetoric, but also for its undeniable role as colonizers.

If I decide to show no skin, or if I want to wear the smallest skimpiest dress in the world, that is my decision. A community full of young women shouldn’t treat each other differently depending on their outfit choices. A sorority should be a space in which women are uplifted through sisterhood, and by regulating their dress code and enforcing the concept that a woman’s worth is correlated to her modesty, a sorority is failing to do so.

It’s taken a lot of energy and effort to try to combat my impostor syndrome and stop comparing myself within STEM. Whether it’s taking the time to write or calling an old friend in between classes, I try to remember the things outside of academia that make me who I am.

My workload that semester had been more than overwhelming, and I was running tight on money, so attending every Greek event wasn’t realistic. Additionally, I hadn’t been excused for missing our sorority’s weekly meeting because I had missed them to study, which didn’t count as an acceptable excuse.

I’m tired of the humanities being viewed as more feminine and therefore less valued than STEM fields. I’m tired of being told I should drop my major in English to a minor so I can focus on CS, when in reality, I am more committed to my English degree.