The headphones settle heavily
against my ears
pressing into the top of my head 

 how are y’all today?
good, good

crack!
my hand jerks as the plastic snaplock
splinters under my fingers
flip open the lid to reveal
a slice of chocolate tiramisu beaded
with condensation 

what did y’all eat today?
here, I’ll show you
wow, there’s so many different dishes, I’m
jealous (laughs)
don’t worry, we’ll take you to the restaurant when you
come back
(puts a bite of vanilla cake and chestnut filling into her mouth)
The chestnut cake design this year is prettier than last year.
I would’ve gotten chestnut if Sheng Kee had it, but I just got chocolate.
is it good though?
sure

raise
a fork sink it
into
pristine layer
after layer and eat
the crater 

I’m
sorry I can’t be there today.
what are you talking about, your education
is more important

poke crumbled
cocoa powder dust 

I know.
(camera gets lost going from hand to hand)
(refocuses)
Hi Grandpa,
happy birthday.

in the silence that follows
his slow nod struggling lips
his muscles hanging at the edge
of his control
I smile wide
for him
wide so that my tears
flow backward
into the tiramisu in my throat
say
something about the weather
and Mondays and what I ate today and the club meeting I came back from
everything I did while they
were celebrating 

(another nod)
(camera moves away from Grandpa)
how were classes today?
good, good

eat
away
at the crater carve out
its heart 

school must be busy, right?
 yeah
yeah very busy

listen
they’re saying something
about going shopping
and getting a late delivery from the restaurant and listen
their voices sound so
close
but I am
50 fucking miles away 

well, we’re glad you called but
you should
get back to your work
no, no it’s fine
don’t you have finals next week, you should
study
I guess…
I guess I should
Grandpa, happy birthday! Bye, everyone!
(they vanish and now it is just my face in the Facetime screen, red
rimming the eyes)

the last bite is so much cocoa that it is bitter
swallow anyway quit the app toss the box play
music loud enough to shake tears back into its craters
and get back to work