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Which drink bottle is superior?

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MARCH 22, 2023

Let’s face it, water bottles are annoying. It doesn’t matter what type they are. Plastic ones eventually get stinky if you don’t wash them with vinegar. Glass ones are too fragile. Metal ones are too heavy and too risky to bring into a lecture hall. Dead silence, and then BANG! The resounding clash of your Hydroflask falling off your table and crashing to the ground. Everyone turns their heads toward you and your face is as red as a tomato. No thanks, I’d rather go thirsty than risk that happening. And who even cares to wash their water bottles anyway? It’s far more practical to just reuse the plastic bottle from the last drink you bought as your water bottle. And the next time you buy another drink, you can replace it. Here’s my guide to the best drink bottles to double as your water bottle.

S-Tier: Gatorade. These are elite. With their orange cap and sturdy plastic, Gatorade bottles can last for at least a couple of weeks. Their wide mouth makes them so easy to rinse and reuse. If you’re looking for a long-term investment that’s the perfect size, grab a Gatorade the next time you visit the grocery store. 

A-Tier: Vitamin Water. These are also elite, but they’re just a bit too pretentious for my taste. Vitamin Water is amazing, no question, but I’m not bougie enough to carry one of these around every day. I prefer the raggedness of Gatorade bottles. But it all depends on your vibe.

B-Tier: Snapple. These aren’t as ubiquitous as the drinks above and they’re kind of boring anyway. The plastic is softer and the shape isn’t anything spectacular. But Snapple itself is a superior drink, so I’d buy one anyway and reuse it as my water bottle for the next week. 

C-Tier: Coke/Sprite. The worst thing about them is that they don’t have a wide mouth so they’re hard to rinse. But if nothing else is available in the vending machine, they are a solid choice, although Sprite has a slight edge. It’s slightly more unique and aesthetically pleasing. 

D-Tier: Normal water such as Dasani, not Voss. Ironic, but trust me when I say these plastic bottles won’t last for long. Eventually, you’ll just toss them and replace them with another identical Dasani. Don’t go down that rabbit hole. It’s just not worth it. Go treat yourself to a Gatorade instead, or if you don’t like Gatorade, give it to someone else to drink before keeping the bottle for yourself.

So there you have it, my ranking of the best drink bottles to double as your water bottle. Actually, most if not all of these bottles are made of single-use plastic, so it’s not recommended to reuse them at all. If you still have the diligence to wash your Hydroflask or Nalgene every day, I respect that. But if you’ve stooped to my level, welcome. 

Contact Josephine Ng at 


MARCH 23, 2023