A few months ago, I wrote an article about all the things I learned about the nation’s favorite show to hate and love, “The Bachelorette.” And although I learned so much about true love and the qualities of a genuine and stable relationship from this show, there are so many things I have yet to learn. This ultimately led me to watch the dramatic spinoff of “The Bachelorette,” “Bachelor in Paradise,” a show in which a bunch of rather interesting singles go on an island to get married. Let me just cut to the chase here — I thought I learned a lot from “The Bachelorette,” but I learned so much more from this show. 

Some significant others are one of a kind, while others are like Pokemon cards; you gotta catch ’em all

At first glance, “Bachelor in Paradise” seems like a show where people seeking love take a long vacation and eventually walk off the island with a fiance. However, I was very much mistaken. I quickly learned that all the people who had their eyes set on someone as their fiance quickly (and frequently) changed suitors. So this got me thinking — maybe love isn’t a one-of-a-kind thing, but it’s just something that is exchanged rapidly until you find something that kind of fits … but more analysis on this point will come once this “Bachelor in Paradise” season is over.

All is fair in love and war (like seriously … literally everything)

One thing that sticks out like a sore thumb in this series is how intense the battle for love truly is. I mean, there are cakes thrown in the campfire (literally), people crying after just a few hours on the island and really deep and personal conversations being completely disregarded when someone new shows up. This show really does demonstrate the positive and negative extremes of love and how those extremes affect a person in the end. Olivia Rodrigo’s hit song, “God, it’s brutal out here,” really does speak for itself about the time on the island. 

Even on a show where everyone’s morally gray, there is no room for gaslighters

Although the show is filled with morally gray people at times, the one thing that I have noticed is that even people who make the moral line a little fuzzy draw the line at gaslighting. The really interesting thing about this show is how gaslighters and manipulators are completely thrown out by the other contestants, proving to the audience that even in a faraway land of bikinis and cocktails, gaslighting and manipulation are not allowed. 

Bikinis heal everything, even broken hearts

When the love of your life just left you for a girl who just showed up and you are now alone in the middle of the ocean, there is one very positive thing to help change your entire mood … at least you look good in that situation. Seriously, the quick turnaround I have seen on this show from emotionally distraught to perfectly fine is 110% because everyone looks hot in their brightly colored bikini sets. In retrospect, I get why this works, and I am now all for bikinis and crying over lost lovers.

The “Bachelor in Paradise” theme song is something everyone should add to their Spotify playlists

This one is pretty self-explanatory. But the one thing I have learned from this show is that for a reality TV show featuring brokenhearted people crying 24/7, the theme song is absolutely outstanding. I highly recommend everyone to listen to this song at least once in their lives, because at the moment, I just can’t stop singing it. 

Well, this brings me to the end of what I have learned from the beaches of “Bachelor in Paradise.” I hope you learned a thing or two about love, but please, don’t apply any of these to relationships in your lives — leave that to the “Bachelor in Paradise” contestants themselves.