There are plenty of articles out there filled with good advice if you’re about to move into an apartment. This isn’t one of them. Instead, below are tips and tricks that you definitely should not even consider. Here is some really bad apartment advice — don’t try this at home, folks.
Take out all the batteries from the smoke alarms
Those pesky smoke alarms can make an awful racket. You cook something on the stove and it starts to burn and before you know it, every smoke alarm in the apartment will start blaring. To keep your apartment nice and peaceful, just take the batteries out. It might cause a fire to sneak up on you or could even be illegal, but who cares about all that. The only thing that matters is that your apartment has some peace and quiet.
Shower without closing the curtain
Taking a shower can be vulnerable. You have no sense of the greater bathroom around you because the opaque curtain is in the way. An easy way to solve this issue is to just shower without pulling the curtain closed. It could get the entire bathroom wet and cause water damage but that doesn’t matter. What matters is that you’re aware of your surroundings.
Do jumping jacks at midnight
Exercise is important, especially since we all got stuck in our homes. It can be hard to find the time, though, in between school and homework. That doesn’t mean you should give up on exercising entirely. Instead, exercise before you go to bed, at midnight or later. A good exercise to do at that time of day is jumping jacks or burpees. Those are aerobic exercises that can work out your entire body. Who cares if it makes a lot of noise and could wake up the downstairs neighbors? Not me!
Steal your roommate’s food and stuff and show it off in front of them
Chances are that you’re living with some roommates. If you are, then there are probably some clothes that they aren’t currently wearing or food that they aren’t eating, which means it’s free for you to take. Make sure to eat their food in front of them while wearing their clothes for the best effect. And under no circumstances should you ask for permission. You’re not doing anything wrong, you’re just exerting your dominance, and your roommate will appreciate how forward you’ve been.
You’re welcome for the tips, all you apartment dwellers out there. Remember, don’t try any of this at home.
